An Afternoon of Tweets: UFC Fight Night 38

The live-tweets of this event was the absolute worst live-tweeting in the history of the UFC for any card that started after 8AM US time.

— tanya (@TheTanyaAttack) March 8, 2014

MY NAME'S RAPPIN GUS AND I'M HERE TO SAY pic.twitter.com/jRgENck5Oh

— Chris Nelson (@3amMMA) March 8, 2014

Jimi Manuwa. Ric Flair. Same thing.

— Seán Sheehan (@SeanSheehanBA) March 8, 2014

OK, Gustafsson's front flip looked like the kinda shit I do on the living room floor for lulz, but that knee + hockey fight punches were A+.

— Jordan Breen (@jordanbreen) March 8, 2014

Melvin Guillard could use a kleenex sponsorship

— TJ De Santis (@TJDeSantis) March 8, 2014

Did Melvin Guillard just try to pull a Chill Dawg?

— Ben Fowlkes (@benfowlkesMMA) March 8, 2014

Nice try, Melvin Guillard. You're not Jamie Varnering your way out of this.

— RJ Clifford (@RJcliffordMMA) March 8, 2014

Prediction: Guillard puts more effort into post-fight talk than in the rest of the fight. #UFCLondon

— Bloody Elbow (@BloodyElbow) March 8, 2014

Gunnar is AWESOME!!!!

— Dana White (@danawhite) March 8, 2014

Neil Seery looks like he rides a bike with a basket on it, and rings his bell at the hillside sheep he passes, waving the whole time.

— Chuck Mindenhall (@ChuckMindenhall) March 8, 2014

"One Punch" Pickett has more submissions than knockouts. "2 Tap" Seery has more knockouts than submissions.

— Mookie Alexander (@mookiealexander) March 8, 2014

Gunnar Nelson was medically cleared to fight despite a massive deficiency in fucks to give. Inspiring.

— pdl (@pdlmma) March 8, 2014

Gunnar Nelson's smile got you feeling all lightheaded, butterflyish? Make sure you got a Gunnar Nelson condom, perv. http://t.co/MAANZvm0uG

— Jordan Breen (@jordanbreen) March 8, 2014

@TheTomasRios Agreed. Just worry about guys with little KO power throwing single strikes trying to MacGyver guys into clever takedowns.

— Jordan Breen (@jordanbreen) March 8, 2014

“I want to thank my fans & the guys who have helped me train over the years."@CyrilleDiabate announces his retirement pic.twitter.com/3UBqNu3Jy6

— UFC News (@UFCNews) March 8, 2014

There's a Frenchman-surrender-guillotine joke in here somewhere.

— RJ Clifford (@RJcliffordMMA) March 8, 2014

Do you think if you put "Ilir Latifi" into a Swedish-English translator it comes up "Patrick Cummins?"

— Dave Doyle (@davedoylemma) March 8, 2014

luke "black the fuck out and hit him with everything" barnatt

— GFKonMMA (@GFKonMMA) March 8, 2014

Silva starting to look like Big Fatty Face from that DirecTV commercial. pic.twitter.com/h5nLzbALL9

— Dann Stupp (@MMAjunkieDann) March 8, 2014

So far it's been 3 fights and I've seen poking, slapping and Green Hair...Am I watching fighting or a rave? #UFC

— MMA Roasted (@MMARoasted) March 8, 2014

I had sushi for breakfast and I'm watching UFC at lunch time. I don't care about propriety. All rules are out the window. Society is dead.

— Jonathan Snowden (@mmaencyclopedia) March 8, 2014

That exchange at the end of the fight reminded me of the battles I had with my older sister when I was like 6. I was ahead of the game

— Damon Martin (@DamonMartin) March 8, 2014

That last flurry, if you can even call it that, basically looked like a couple of five year olds fighting over a G.I. Joe. Sad.

— Freddie DeFreitas (@freddefreitas) March 8, 2014

"Used the inheritance money to buy a gi" That's not an inheritance. That's a struggle check.

— Stephie D (@CrooklynMMA) March 8, 2014

I'm rating Danny Mitchell's mullet at 3.5 out of 5 Mike Pyles.

— Mike Whitman (@mikewhitmanmma) March 8, 2014

Cheesecake Assassin + Mullet = The UFC Fight Pass prelims!

— Rob Tatum (@RobTatumMMA) March 8, 2014

Totally agree. Great idea. RT @davedoylemma: I'm kind of digging the British announcers, comes off like a fresh coat of paint.

— Ariel Helwani (@arielhelwani) March 8, 2014

Good win for Gaudinot, but did Harris not know he was capable of that? Gaudinot's only won w/ that move 2X and threatened w/ it many more.

— jim genia (@jim_genia) March 8, 2014